You have no idea how much these phrases and words are damaging your life and stopping you from moving forwards. They will prevent you stepping outside your comfort zone or doing anything different, regardless of whether you might enjoy it or it’s potentially beneficial for you.
I Can’t Because ….
This shows that your brain is working from the primitive part, the part that looks for problems to put in the way, the part that is creating anxiety in your life and this is the biggest reason why you need to eliminate this. When your brain automatically looks for the problems, you are negatively forecasting the future and it’s that negative forecasting that your brain interprets as some sort of crisis, emergency or danger and converts to anxiety and store it causing anxiety levels creep up and up until it overflows.
You might use it once or twice and wonder what the problem is, but if this becomes part of your regular and automatic ‘go to’ as an excuse for not doing something, you need to become aware of the larger picture and the bigger impact this simple phrase is having on your subconscious mind. Your subconscious (or unconscious) is sending this forward for you as an excuse because it’s automatically looking for problems to worry about.
What might seem to you is an insignificant phrase you use on a regular basis will be having a bigger negative impact on your subconscious mind that you realise.
Swap ‘I can’t because’ for ‘How can I?’ and give your brain a positive instruction to find an answer instead of an automatic negative excuse if there is something you want to do.
‘The problem is …’
The same principal applies – your brain is looking for a problem and your brain will only focus on the object in question; so when you are saying ‘the problem is ‘I haven’t got time’ or ‘I can’t afford it’, your mind will just focus on the problem and whatever you focus on will get bigger and bigger – imagine how that words when you’re saying ‘I can’t because I don’t have any money’. When you focus on your problems you will grow the ten-fold, you will put not having money in the forefront of your mind and keep that situation live.
Focus on solutions instead, so instead of thinking ‘the problem is’, think of in in terms of ‘how can i make this happen’ or ‘what do I need to change’ or ‘what could I compromise on or cut out or sell in order to create the additional income you need. Think of it from a positive perspective. Don’t let your subconscious become focused on the negative and restrict your life.
You need to redirect your brain to your positive intellect away from your negative primitive brain that stops you doing things, so you can find solutions and answers and move your life forwards.
‘The problem is’ and ‘I can’t because’ come out from your subconscious before your intellect has even had the chance to work on a solution if you let it, dismissing possibilities and opportunities before you can even consider them.
The two words you need to eliminate are:-
Always & Never
‘Never’ is a very long time indeed and things don’t happen ‘always’. Think of the true meaning of the word because that’s how your subconscious will translate it. Using these words demonstrates you are working from the primitive part of your mind that thinks in global terms. It is very easy to slip into using these words but you are giving your brain an instruction to give up.
If you are telling yourself ‘I’ll never’ be able to….’, you’re going to be right and that’s why it is so dangerous for you to think in those terms if you do have things you want to do or achieve in life. If you are telling yourself ‘I’m never going to be able to buy a house’, ‘I’ll never get enough deposit together’, you’re giving your brain and yourself the instruction to dismiss the idea altogether and don’t even bother trying. Consequently you wont start saving and you will be right.
Not right now doesn’t mean ‘never’ but the literal meaning of the word is the interpretation the subconscious picks up on and holds you back.
It’s the same with ‘always’ – things don’t happen all the time. When you are working from your primitive brain, it might seem like it because this part of the brain comes from the time of ‘kill or be killed’, ‘eat or be eaten’, it comes from extremes so it will think in the terms of all or nothing, always and never. But this is not reality. Your brain doesn’t know the difference between imagination and reality so if you think in these words – it’s your brain, it will believe you and interpret the literal meaning of the word.
You need to get out of the habit of using ‘always‘, ‘never‘, ‘I can’t because‘ and ‘the problem is‘. These words and phrases have a negative impact on your life, they stop you doing the things you want, they stop you achieving the things you can achieve when you set you mind to it. When you want to do something, when you believe you can, you can move mountains. However, if you have these phrases and words in your subconscious vocabulary and in your life you will self sabotage your efforts.