Although it may seem hard to change how you deal with people, it is in your interest to do things differently. If you say ‘yes’ but mean ‘no’ you don’t have the right to resent the other person for taking you up on your offer or accepting your ‘yes’ at face value. A little bit of discomfort in the short term while you’re adjusting will be rewarded with less anxiety and more time for looking after you.

You cannot change other people, so hoping they will see how their actions are wrong is a long hope. But you can, without anyone else being the wiser, quietly and calmly change how you are doing things so that the dynamics of the relationships in your life fall into place easily and without any anxiety on your part.

You don’t have to change everything overnight, but practice the strategies, look after yourself and continue to experiment with positive determination and you will find it easier and easier to hold your boundaries and accept it’s OK to say No.

Remember it is far easier for the other person to hear ‘no’ than it is for you to say it. When people know where they stand they have the opportunity to deal with the situation – wouldn’t you rather know if someone else was doing something for you under duress?

As with anything in life that you want to become a habit, get good at and be comfortable with – Practice.

If you have found this course helpful but have particularly tricky and controlling people in your life we would also recommend ‘How to Manage People Who Are Controlling’.